Have Fun With English


Feeding time at the zoo

A bloke starts his new job as a zoo keeper and is given three tasks:-

The first is to clear the exotic fish pool of weeds. As he does this a huge fish jumps out and bites him. To show the others who's boss he beats it to death with a spade. Realising his employer won't be best pleased, he disposes of the fish by feeding it to the lions, as everyone knows that lions will eat anything.

Moving on to the second job of clearing out the chimp house, he is attacked by the chimps that pelt him with coconuts. He swipes at two chimps with a spade, killing them both.

What can he do? Feed them to the lions, he says to himself, because lions eat anything. So he hurls the corpses into the lion enclosure.

He moves on to the last job, which is to collect honey from the South American bees. As soon as he starts, he is attacked by the bees. He grabs his spade and smashes the bees to a pulp. By now he knows what to do and throws them in to the lion enclosure.

Later that day, a new lion arrives at the zoo. He wanders up to a lioness and asks "What's the food like around here?"

The lioness replies "Absolutely brilliant. Today we had fish and chimps with mushy bees."




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